A friend of mine sent us a Christmas card this year addressed to “Lewis (party of four).” It was sweet. But seeing those words written on paper really did something to me. It’s funny, when you foster and when you adopt, the paperwork seems endless. Your reading words and words and words and signing your name over and over and over.
But seeing that small white envelope that read “Lewis (party of four)” was like a confirmation in my heart that this is real. It’s really happening.
God has blessed me with so much. I was thinking today that the most amazing blessings came from some of the hardest journey’s I’ve had to take. These blessings have been both what God has taught me and how I grew from that and these blessings have been some pretty amazing gifts… my husband, my son, and now a second son.
All three of those are blessings that came after struggling with some pretty difficult things for me. But I wonder – if I hadn’t had the struggle first, would I appreciate the blessing as much as I do?
I don’t know but I do know that God knows what He is doing. The journey to Little Bit was not an easy one. But oh my goodness was it worth it.
I laugh at the thought that I tried so hard to keep my guard up with him. To not fall in love with him during those first couple of months of thinking we were just temporarily caring for him. But the moment Bart and I decided we were supposed to fight for him – it was like all that love that I didn’t acknowledge was instantly there and he was ours. Y’all – there really isn’t a way to explain it.
It’s supernatural. It’s what adoption is. It’s what God did for us.
You think that you are only capable of so much but thank goodness God knows better! I get to kiss these sweet little toes every day now.
Yesterday we sang “Oceans” at church. I had shared with y’all how singing worship songs helped get me through the waiting for Little Bit (at the time we thought it was Baby Girl. Little turkey tricked us). It was hard waiting and not knowing where his birth mom was and what she was doing. This was one of those songs that pierced me and was a go to on the bad days. My favorite verse from the song is this…
“Your grace abounds in deepest waters.
Your sovereign hand will be my guide.”
The deeper I felt I was sinking the more and more grace he provided. What a precious precious thing he does for us!